A Blogging Beginning

I never thought I would be a blogger. I've journaled before with more or less regularity but this is a whole new world for me.

I've been thinking about me as a writer since reading that first chapter in my text book. I have spent some time writing poetry and stories but it has been many years since I have written in a school setting. I'm not the same person I was 25 years ago. It will be interesting to see how this lapse in time will have improved or weakened my skill.

Last night I read some things my grandmother wrote to and for me some 35 years ago. Of course, I cried through it all they were very sweet and touching and I miss her but when my 8 year old started crying I was confused. He said he wished he had been able to meet her. It made me think about how I did feel so close to her when all I have left are her words on paper and I wished I had somethings my own mother had written. She felt to inadequate when it came to writing that if she could she would avoid it. My father found a file folder of all the letters I had written to my parents the first year of my marriage. My mother had saved all of them. They were living in Korea at the time and telephone calls were much to expensive a way to communicate it was fun reading through them and remembering those times. I also have a file folder full of the letters from them but my father wrote them all. I am grateful to have them but I miss not having something of her. I have found little lists and notes but nothing that shows how she was feeling or tells us who she really was.

My grandmother is the one who opened by eyes to the world of literature. She took me to the library one day and I asked her which books I should choose. She said "any ones you want". When I had gone to the school library before the teacher had shown us which shelves to choose our books from. After looking around for a while I choose Peter Pan, a nice thick chapter book. Someone else may have thought it was too big a book for a second grader but I loved it and couldn't wait to get my hands on something else. As far as she was concerned there were no limits to what I could handle. Now, I find myself tapping into the feelings she gave me. School, and family I can do that. I capable of more than other people think and more than I think. I have proved that before, who would have thought I would be the mother of 12 children? not me! but here I am and they are all cared for and happy. I can choose any book off the shelves.